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Tuesday, December 22, 2009

guess you should know.
by me being silent doesnt mean discreet agreement;
to the things you've done, whether its right or wrong.

i've been through all sorts of obstacles in life,
but none has dragged this long.
it seems like a drama with 365 episodes;
feels like it never ends,
and it keeps going on and on, scene after scene,
whether you like it or not.

just when i thought its time to put a full stop,
problems occur again.
without fail, there will be a reason anyhow to all the arguments.

im too tired and sick to pop my ass in their conflicts.
its not like i dont feel a thing but,
im just too immuned to be bothered.
its not like i didnt do anything to make things better but,

adults are stubborn.
so stubborn where they would just listen to your words,
but not do anything about it at all.
they feel what they want to, they do what they want to,
they say what they want to, they behave how they want to.
the power to change is never in my hands.

i dont wanna be involved in between them.
thats all i could ever wish for this christmas.

Monday, December 21, 2009

I get so breathless, when you call my name,
I've often wondered, do you feel the same?
There's a chemistry, energy, a synchronicity
When we're all alone,
So don't tell me
You can't see
What I'm thinking of

Sunday, December 20, 2009

i keep changing blog skins wtf
semester has reach an end but expectations for results arent high.
gotten a job which is easy and relaxed despite the weird working hours.

its been weeks since i havent seen my babyboy :(
and yes, i do miss him very very much :((

dinner at my crib before he left :(

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Made For P

a box of apologies to make it up to my boy.

Monday, October 5, 2009

My Fair Lady

couldnt sleep from 3am last night until 9 this morning. head to school and teman P for shooting. Qing Liew misses me thats why she called. haha! met up and camwhore with her MacBook while waiting for P to be done.

its been really a while since i met my fair lady.
(i'll call her my fair lady from today onwards because she's freaking fair)
will work plans out for movies real soon!

Thursday, October 1, 2009

i've been going through the toughest pain i had to endure for the past week. growth of wisdom tooth can be so painful, i didnt know that. :( dad said that different people have different reactions towards it. some may not feel the pain but unlucky ones will. that obviously, includes me. :(

besides, my family has been going through quite a tough time recently. dont have to mention what because everything is okay now; i hope so. during this period, everyone in the family has to show effort and affection to put us back together. and i, as the eldest, of course would have to play my part right. fingers crossed, when the past is gone, the better day awaits.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

In A Relationship

set the past aside, leave it behind and start a new chapter in this whole new story.
♥ ♥ ♥

Sunday, September 20, 2009

stop telling me that she's mad again, stop asking me whats there to do to gain him back.
both of you have been showering me with problems and questions like these for the past few months.
if your plans are to blow out my mind, you got it; sooner or later.
i've had enough.

its like buying apples without considering if its good or not. when you start eating it and found out it was rotten, you come to me and spit it out right at my face, asking me why did it turn out like this.

should the ones who behaved badly and caused the tragic aftermath be responsible for what we go through today; not me. not because im the eldest, not because im the wiser one.

i feel deeply pressured every time i think things in between. knowing the fact that im a part of it no matter what, i feel that i am in desperate need to mend things up. not to fix it flawlessly but at least for the better.

leave the past behind.
if you dont,
you'll never move on,
you'll never be happy again.

Thursday, September 3, 2009


i couldnt take this anymore. i need to shouuuutttt ! do you think you could just come and go as you like and whenever you want? you've never respected my privacy do you? you dont have any ethics because you're just purely uneducated, yes you are. i wonder whats in that 0.0001mm mind of yours, for you could just appear in my sight out of no where. do you know that your presence never failed to freak the shit out of me every single time? sorie but the fact is, you are ugly. you are the ugliest thing i've ever seen in my life. i dont like you at all you see. so can you please stop bothering me and stop making my life miserable? i really couldnt be patient to you anymore and i have reach my limit of tolerance. if i ever see you again, i'll just have to eliminate you from the world. you are just a disgrace of your race and you're taking too much space on the earth. im so hating you to the extent where i've made a vow to myself. if i ever see you again, i will make sure your skinny limbs are scattered around the world, your brains are stuffed in your anus, your faeces comes out from your nose and your intestines are crushed into liquid form. in short, i will take your life away from you without letting you any chance to beg at all, BY ALL MEANS.

how does that sound? :)

Friday, August 14, 2009

its been four fucking days since i fell sick. why am i still dealing with all these pain? damn i am so emotionally disturbed now. i am emo, bitch. its a friday night but i dont feel like heading out. but for rachy's sake i decided to grasp some fresh air outside. in the end, plan was cancelled and it brought me down to the ground. besides, P just had an accident in JB and i am missing him terribly. tried to call but i guess his phone was dead. "hello, the person you called is unavailable" blablabla fuck im worried :(

why is this happening to me? im totally not a fan of mood swings but it did hit on me! menstrual period is not here yet. maybe thats the reason to it. i shall stop ranting and put myself to sleep.